Happy Mother's Day - South Dade News Leader: Opinion

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Happy Mother's Day

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Posted: Friday, May 11, 2018 1:00 am

   This Sunday we take the time to honor those women who have raised us to be the people we are today. Whether by birth, adoption or through friendship, these women guide us through life, teach us right from wrong and give us a shoulder to lean on when we need it. She laughs and cries with us and wipes away our tears. She is so important in our lives that a 2-year-old needs her just as much as a 65-year-old. She is wonderful. She is our Mother.

   This is my first Mother’s Day without my mom and it hurts. As I type this, I didn’t even finish the first paragraph when the tears came and she is not here to wipe them away. I miss my Mom. I can’t send her flowers, a card or gifts. I can’t call her and tell her how much I love her. I can’t hug her and kiss her, tease or joke with her. It’s been six months now since Mom passed and it has gotten a little easier to deal with but my heart aches as I miss her so. This Mother’s Day will be hard.

   As I think of my Mom, I remember the not so nice times for which I am so sorry. The times when I was so angry at her for not letting me do things I thought I should be doing. The time she chased me up the stairsteps with a hairbrush because I sassed her. The times I dreaded her brushing my long red hair as a child and she would say, “You must suffer for beauty.” The times when I felt she was working too much at the local 5 and 10 and not meeting my immediate needs and I yelled at her. I said that she shouldn’t be tired because all she did all day was push buttons (the cash register). The time I got ice skates for Christmas in a particularly warm winter and I bawled like a baby and made her feel bad. The time when my daddy passed and we entered the funeral home only for my Mom to start passing out for which she was well-known for doing and I yelled at her, “Get up Mom. Don’t you dare go down because none of us are going to pick you up.” Oh, so many things that I am so sorry for.

   And then there are the good times that far outweighed the bad. The times Mom would take me to the best children’s shop in town, Mrs. Brown’s Children Shop, as she always saw that I was well dressed even though I was a chubby one. I didn’t realize that this was probably why she worked!

   The times that she made sure we had picnics every Sunday during the summer with family. The times she had bubble gum blowing contests with me and my siblings and our aunts and grandparents. The times when I sang solos in church and school and she was there to support me. The times she came to Florida to see her new grandchildren after they were born and I could see her happiness. The “girls’ trips” we took throughout the state. Just her and I. The way we laughed together so hard until we cried. The visits with her in Cape Coral as her health was declining…we loved our quality time together. Oh, so many things I am so thankful for that we enjoyed together.

   I remember a visit with my mother when she was in the hospital during the last 11 months of her life. Mom asked me to stay with her even though she was going to nap and I told her I would stay there. Later when she woke up she said to me, “Sissy I’m so sorry you are having to go through this with me.” I cried and told her, “Mom there is no other place or thing I would rather do.” And that was the truth.

   There are other women in my life who have been “mothers” to me and I’m sure you too remember those women. This Sunday, I honor my deceased mother but I also honor those other women who have or continue to guide me in my life. My dear mother-in-law who I love with all my heart. An elderly woman who used to live in Homestead and one who still does and who I love to visit. I will send them cards, call them and thank them. They are still guiding me through this thing called life.

   Perhaps the greatest honor I can give in my mom’s memory are the things that I carried through me and now my children are passing on to their children. As I watch our girls with their little ones, I often hear, “You must suffer for beauty” as they brush out their hair. And I smile. And I think of Mom.

   Take the time on Sunday to reach out to your mother or someone who has been like a mother to you. Maybe there is someone you know whose family can’t be with her this Sunday. Reach out to her.

Recorded by Eddy Arnold and written by Theodore Morse and Howard Johnson, a famous song says it all:

M is for the million things she gave me. O means only that she's growing old. T is for the tears she shed to save me. H is for her heart of purest gold. E is for her eyes with love-light shining. R means right and right she'll always be. Put them all together they spell mother,

A word that means the world to me.

I miss my mom.

And remember… I can be contacted at doris@newsleadermail.com!

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