Beam me up Scotty - South Dade News Leader: Opinion

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Beam me up Scotty

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Posted: Friday, August 11, 2017 10:42 am

The other day at lunch our office was discussing time travel and how nice it would be to just say, "Beam me up, Scotty" only to be transported to wherever we wanted to go.  Hey...a few years ago we were talking about having phones that you can carry with you all the time.  Hello?  It's called a cellphone and they have come a long way baby so who knows what is possible.

This would be similar to the young Mike Teevee in Willie Wonka and the Chocolate Factory.  He was beamed into a tv and was made small.  Ooooh...maybe we could have our size reduced as well.

Just imagine if time travel were possible.  Would this put an end to road rage or would there be people who want to strike out at whoever transported them or whatever?  Oh, and bumper to bumper traffic.  Would beaming me up do away with that?

But then I begin to wonder.  Would I be able to take my luggage with me or would it be just myself?  What about groceries?  Could I be beamed up to the grocery store and then home so my ice cream wouldn't melt?  

What if there was a malfunction?  Everything in this world at one time or the other malfunctions.  This past Sunday I was in Winn-Dixie on Old Dixie Highway and the store was hit with strong power surges.  No storm or anything but it took down their computers and cash registers for over thirty minutes.  What a hassle for the store and customers however the store adapted and handled the situation with class.  Apologies were made over the intercom and the store did not allow new customers in.  A few customers in line left the items and left the store but most stayed.  A young girl in customer service brought the elderly gentleman in front of me with a cane, a chair to sit.  Once everything came back on line, the manager brought all employees up front to help ease the line and get people through the registers as quickly as possible.  A class act in a bad situation and Winn-Dixie should be proud of the way this store

reacted.

Just think of all the frustrating and aggravating situations that you could zap yourself out of.  Boss is yelling at you...beam me up.  Bullets flying at you...beam me up.  Car crash about to happen.... beam me up.  An uncomfortable situation...beam me up.

What if we accidentally were transported to the wrong place at the wrong time?  Suddenly we are standing in someone's living room and we don't know who they are?  Or they're bedroom better yet?  We could get ourselves in trouble but then again...it might be fun!

Beam me up, Scotty is a catchphrase that made its way into popular culture from the science fiction television series Star Trek.  Captain Kirk would give his chief engineer Montgomery "Scotty" Scott this command when he needed to be transported back to the Starship Enterprise.  There are so many times in my life...and if you think about it...probably yours too where you would love to have used that phrase.

A few years ago, I was in Pennsylvania and my girlfriend was driving me to her house.  As the curb was very high on the driver's side, she told me to get out and go in the house while she parked.  I had been there about five years earlier and she said her husband was in the house so I hopped out of the car and headed in.  On the way in I noticed that the front porch was ill-kept with the ash bins from the furnace sitting on the porch and it just looked messy.  I thought to myself that they are really letting the place get run down.  I walked in and yelled, "Hello Herb!  The Florida Goddess (the name their kids call me) is here!"  At that, a woman about 30 walked out of the kitchen, looked at me and said, "Who the h@#$ are you?"  At that moment, I wished I could have been beamed up as I was in the wrong house!  My friend's house was two doors up.  Needless to say, my friend was outside doubled over with laughter!

Who knows what is to come in the future.  What will our children and grandchildren see that we never thought could ever happen?  Look at what we have seen in our lifetimes that I'm sure our parents and grandparents never thought of.

To coin another catchphrase, "Necessity is the mother of invention" infers that difficult situations inspire ingenious solutions.  

Ok so who is going to start inventing?  I'm tired and want to go home so Beam me up Scotty!

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